lets keep this dream alive;

woah, life's awkward.

i don't really know what this blog is going to be about yet, but it's going to be almost cool. hopefully. anyway, just so everything is clear ahead of time, i love meg & dia. they're a girl band, but they're awesome. if i was a girl, i would want to be just like dia. she writes cool blogs about ice cream. hm. i don't really like ice cream..but that's besides the point. meg & dia are the coolest people i don't know ever. hah..

also, i'm about sick of youth group. i went tonight like i always do, and wasn't really expecting much. because well..lately it just hasn't been much fun. but it fell way short of my expectations. but not because you may think. i just want to smack larry, and all the other kids pretty much. they just don't shut up. all i want to do is hang out. but noo, freaking kids sit there and yell the whole time. i hate it. i doubt i'll go again. unless my parents make me..

just like they make me go to church! they want me to be this huge Jesus kid. but that's just not me. i mean, i believe in him and everything. i just don't know how to explain it. it's like, Jesus is cool and all, but there isn't a point in church. honestly, i think i've grown closer to him every time i've skipped church.

enough of that..i'm starting to get angry (hah..angry paul..). i need to think of something happy. uhmm..some people just make me happy i guess. i don't knoww. i'm just not a typically happy person. i feed off of other peoples happiness. that's probably not a good thing. but that's how i work. i also feed off of the kind of music that's on. like, a realll happy song could be playing, and i would be all happy. then as soon as a sad one comes on, sad paul.

i think i'm bipolar. my mood changes all the time, and i don't know why. maybe it's because half the time i'm only fake happy. that's bad.. i should change that. i really hope this year gets good fast. don't get the wrong impression though. i have plentlyy of reasons to be happy. i could name all the people that make me happy, but that would just be weird. 'cause if they read this blog.. it would just be weird. i don't know.

oh! i think i'm going to start doing live recordings of covers. like, through a mic. then put them up on myspace. that'd be cool, right? i want to do a cover of unwell by matchbox twenty. or my girl. or something cooler. something by the beatles maybe. i love them. maybe something by the spill canvas. they're definitely one of my favorite bands ever. only the acoustic stuff though.. or! maybe something by mayday parade. i like them too. i don't know. i'll figure it out later. stayyy tuned.

i've always wanted to say that. like, on tv though. it'd be awesome. but i'm thinking the closest i'll ever get to that is on a blog. that's sad.

enough of that bull honkey. that was a pointless post.

end.