just a word;

i don't know what i'm doing lately..

if love is just a concept;

then tears are just the rain.

if love is just a word;

then all my words are vain.

also, i'm so sick of school.

we'll be a dream;

this is going to be an about me kind of deal..

okayy, so...in real life, i'm a big nerd. i could easily get straight a's in school if i wanted. but i never really wanted to because i guess it's "not cool". whatever. anyway, i know how to put together a computer from scratch, and could fix yours no matter what i you did to it. and i mean it. i know what this means, and could "hack" just about anything i own. i like to play pokemon. yellow, and sometimes sapphire. i could go on and on..

but i won't. so, i want to find somebody i can be myself around. i'm constantly trying to be someone i'm not. and it bugs the shit out of me, honestly. oh, and i've decided i'm not going to swear any more. that was the last time. anyway, if i ever find someone, you'll know, cause i'll be around them probably allll the time. from now on, i'm paul. not who somebody wants me to be. 'cause that's dumb.

i wish i was in 8th grade again. it was honestly one of the best years of my life. i didn't care about anything. everything was simple, and just worked. now there's all this bull honkey that screws everything up. i can't stand growing up, everyone says it's the best part of your life..but mine's a mess. hm..i just had to get that out.

woah, back to about me. the simple things mean the most to me. just like, little things that nobody would think are big deals. to me, they are. like when somebody smiles when they talk to me. or if they come up to me and start a conversation. or even just saying hi when they see me. ha, if somebody came up to me, said "hi", and were smiling while they said it, then started a real conversation, it would make my whole day. maybe even my week.

something else about me..joana, is my bestttt friend. favorite favorite best friend if you want to get technical. she's awesome. she forced me to do footloose, and i'm so glad. literally, she dragged me into the auditorium and made me sit next to her. thennnn! i was willard. willard hewitt. and honestly, i didn't think i could do it. i didn't think i could one bit. i'm the most shy person you will everr meet. but she wouldn't let me give up. i'm pretty sure she's the only shoulder i've ever cried on too. and if you've never cried on somebodies shoulder, it's one of the best feelings in the world. i love her.

i keep getting off subject..back to mee. i love music. if i could, i would sit in my basement and play guitar all day long. and sing loud while i do it. 'cause nobody can hear me down here. it's awesome. oh, on the subject of music, but still staying about me..i think music these days sucks. none of it actually has any meaning to the person that wrote it. and half of the people that record music can't actually sing in real life. i could go on forever about this..but i'll leave it at that.

that's pretty much all i'm willing to share about me. if you really want to know me though, spend some time with me. but know i have trust issues. i'm not an open book, so don't expect to know everything about me in a month. or even a year. actually, i've been extremely close to somebody for about five years now, and that person still hardly knows much about me.

basically, i'm just an average kid, looking for more than the average kid is looking for.

i need to clean my basement..